Do you need a new dress? Take a look on Ebay "Tracy Brabin MP "shouldergate" black dress"
Ha ha

Over my lunch I was reading a favourite magazine and a lady had written an interesting letter in the 'letter' column .....she had visited Holland and found it impressively clean and tidy, no litter, no overflowing bins, no chewing gum-splattered pavements and no fly-tipping...and I've just driven home, myself, dodging ruddy potholes in our roads everywhere. We really need to 'clean up our act' here in the UK. What do you feel?

Propose Day Date in the current year: February 8, 2020
Propose Day Propose Day is celebrated on February 8, the second day of the Valentine’s week. If you’ve been meaning to propose to your significant other for quite some time but haven’t actually gotten to do it yet, this day is just for you!

Valentine’s Day is a holiday of love and romance, which is celebrated not only in Christian countries (in fact, it has long been absent from the official church calendar), but also around the world. For many people, Valentine's Day is a great occasion to finally propose to their significant other, but some believe that this is too cheesy. If you belong to the latter, consider proposing to your sweetheart on Propose Day, which is celebrated earlier than Valentine’s Day, but during the same week. And if their answer is “Yes!”, you can properly celebrate your engagement on February 14.

Back in the day, in many cultures it was traditional for a man to ask permission to marry from a woman’s father before proposing to her or even instead of proposing. In some cases, the woman’s opinion didn’t really matter; a marriage was a kind of a business transaction where the woman and her dowry were passed from one man (father or an older relative) to another. Sadly, the tradition persists in some cultures even today.

Luckily, in most of the Western world women are free to decide whom to marry (or whether they want to get married at all), and sometimes even are the first to propose to their partners instead of waiting to be asked the big question. Do you know, for example, that Queen Victoria had to propose to Prince Albert because she was a reigning monarch at the time of their engagement? In the United States, about 5% of women are the first to propose, so jewelry companies have even started manufacturing engagement rings for men.

There are a lot of ways to propose. Some prefer the traditional option, where the person who is proposing (usually the man) bends a knee in front of their significant other, asks “Will you marry me?” and presents an engagement ring. Some surprise their significant other by hiding a ring in a dessert or dropping it in a glass of champagne, and some arrange treasure hunts or flash mobs to make their marriage proposal really unforgettable.

Be that as it may, the main thing is that a marriage proposal should be made sincerely and with love, not just because you’re expected to propose. That is why some people prefer to propose on February 8 instead of Valentine’s Day, so that their partner won’t think that they have succumbed to the Valentine’s Day “love fever” and can be sure in the sincerity of their feelings and the seriousness of their intentions.

By the way, in addition to Propose Day, there are other holidays when you can propose to your significant other. For example, National Proposal Day in the United States is celebrated on March 20. And in Scotland, Ireland, England and Finland, there is a custom where a woman can propose to her partner on February 29 in a leap year.

You are at a country pub on a gloriously warm summer afternoon with old friends. You are sitting outside in the crowded spacious garden. Other tables are receiving their lunch orders delivered by the staff shouting "order for Jack Jones" - ""order for Dave Goodman".
Having got your friends list for food you go inside to place the order, but you're feeling mischievous [ after the first drink ] and decide to give a famous name to be shouted round when the delivery is announced.
What name did you give? what happened next?

You'll also like 'Secrets of the Museum' - the first episode was today at 8 pm on BBC 2!

https://www.thesun.ie/news/5068141/evil-builder-dad-murdered-his-kids-by-injecting-quick-hardening-construction-foam-down-their-throats/

I think this is one of the most horrific stories I have ever seen.

One of the greatest actors Kirk Douglas passed away at the grand old age of 103 years old.

“I am Spartacus”

When Hermione talked about Amortentia - the love potion - she said that it smells different to each person, according to what attracts them. Hers smelt like freshly mown grass, new parchment & spearmint toothpaste. What do you think yours would smell like?

https://youtu.be/AC0IgwmsRSE

Click to enlarge

Safer Internet Day Safer Internet Day is an annual observance organized by the Insafe network each February. It is dedicated to raising awareness of emerging online issues, from social networking to cyberbullying, and making Internet a safer place for kids and young people across the world.

Safer Internet Day was founded in 2004 as an initiative of the European Union SafeBorder project. The next year, the Insafe network took over the organization. Originally a European observance, Safer Internet Day is celebrated across all populated continents, in over 100 countries. It promotes more responsible use of Internet and gadgets by children and young people who are growing up in a digital environment.

Technology has become an integral part of our lives, but a lot of people are unaware of the challenges and opportunities online. That's why Safer Internet Day is so important. It aims to educate people of all ages across the world about Internet through events at schools and colleges, conferences, press conferences, and other events. On this day, industry professionals gather to exchange their ideas on what a safer and better online world is and how to create it.

There are a lot of ways to celebrate Safer Internet Day. You can get involved in internet safety debates, create and promote positive content, report illegal and harmful content, teach children digital literacy skill, etc.

Click on picture to enlarge

https://allthatsinteresting.com/dymka-cat-titanium-paws

Although this story is several months old I thought it was interesting. What do others think 🤔

Nobody seems to have mentioned it but today's a palindrome date ie: 02-02-2020 and we won't see another one like it for a while.

It's also the 33rd day of the year with 333 days left.

Now getting a bar of functions across bottom of pages, don't really like it, it seems to get in the way when i am typing and I have to scroll down further.

... Is that jokes or people? Hmmm!

How True!

World Wetlands Day The value of wetlands should be appreciated everyday, but only one day a year it's remembered on international level. February 2 is World Wetlands Day, the international day of awareness of wetlands.

The signing of the Convention of Wetlands (known as Ramsar Convention due to the name of city in Iran, where it was signed) on February 2, 1971 became the basis of creation of World Wetlands Day in 1997, when it was celebrated for the first time. Only 18 countries signed Ramsar Convention in 1971, but later 159 countries joined the convention. Over 2,000 sites are included into the Ramsar List of Wetlands of International Importance, covering more than 200,000,000 ha.

Annually government agencies, non-government organizations and groups of citizens act to raise public awareness of the importance and value of wetlands. More than 95 countries contributed into celebration of World Wetlands Day. Numerous activities were held during the time of the celebration: lectures, seminars, art contests, clean-up days, radio and television interviews, letters to newspapers. Everything was aimed to launch the wetlands protection policies.
World Wetlands Day The value of wetlands should be appreciated everyday, but only one day a year it's remembered on international level. February 2 is World Wetlands Day, the international day of awareness of wetlands.

The signing of the Convention of Wetlands (known as Ramsar Convention due to the name of city in Iran, where it was signed) on February 2, 1971 became the basis of creation of World Wetlands Day in 1997, when it was celebrated for the first time. Only 18 countries signed Ramsar Convention in 1971, but later 159 countries joined the convention. Over 2,000 sites are included into the Ramsar List of Wetlands of International Importance, covering more than 200,000,000 ha.

Annually government agencies, non-government organizations and groups of citizens act to raise public awareness of the importance and value of wetlands. More than 95 countries contributed into celebration of World Wetlands Day. Numerous activities were held during the time of the celebration: lectures, seminars, art contests, clean-up days, radio and television interviews, letters to newspapers. Everything was aimed to launch the wetlands protection policies.

is an annual campaign held on February 2. It was established in 2013 by the Rheumatoid Patient Foundation, a non-profit organization dedicated improving the lives of people suffering from rheumatoid diseases.

Rheumatoid arthritis (RA) is a progressive inflammatory disease that primarily affects joints and often results in painful and deformed joints. It is a chronic autoimmune disorder the cause of which is not completely understood. RA affects between 0.5 and 1% of adults in developed countries. People of middle age are affected most often, but the condition can develop at any age.

RA cannot be cured. Existing treatments (medication, physical therapy, etc.) can only help slow the progression of joint destruction and relieve pain. The treatment focuses on minimizing symptoms, maintaining day-to-day functioning, and preventing bone deformation. For most patients, current treatments cannot assure a healthy future.

Rheumatoid Awareness Day was established to recognize people with rheumatoid disease and educate wide audiences about RA. The Rheumatoid Patient Foundation encourages people to get involved by promoting awareness messages, participating in relevant events, and sharing educational resources.

Just had a big clear out of the house while dad is in hospital I gave about a dozen black bags of stuff to the charity that collected yesterday. But I still have 35 full black bags that are for the rubbish collection. Plus about 10 flattened large boxes to go alongside the overfull paper box.
I don't think the bin men would appreciate me putting it all out at once, but how many would you put out?

Just had an email from bank to advise against using Windows 7 for banking - has anyone else received a message or just my bank. Advises using a different system (I'm presuming that means Window 10) or tablet - I do have a Fire tablet but feel 'safer' on desktop and don't have banking on my tablet - and would be even less happy having it on a phone (if I had a smart phone, which I haven't).

Today is our Independence Day! I shall be raising a glass to the future, whatever it may bring! WOO HOO!

Imbolc (Imbolg) is an ancient Gaelic festival that marks the beginning of spring. It is typically held on February 1 and is often associated with the feast of Saint Brigit of Kildare.

Imbolc is one of the four Gaelic festivals associated with the changing seasons, along with Beltane, Lughnasadh, and Samhain. Historically, it was widely observed in Ireland, Scotland, and the Isle of Man. After the introduction of Christianity, it merged with Saint Brighid's Day, just like many other pagan festivals transformed into Christian holidays.

The word “Imbolc” derives from the Old Irish expression which means “in the belly”. This refers to the pregnancy of ewes. In Gaelic Island, the festival of Imbolc marked the beginning of the lambing season and the onset of spring.

Imbolc is strongly associated with the Gaelic goddess Brighid, one of the Tuatha Dé Danann. She was honored as the patroness of cattle and other livestock, arts and crafts, sacred wells, smithing, medicine, poetry, and the arrival of early spring. People believed that on Imbolc eve Brighid blessed the inhabitants of virtuous households as they slept.

On Imbolc, people made bonfires, prepared special foods and attempted to predict weather. Although many of its customs died out, Imbolc is still observed by Celtic neopagans in some localities.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-51325192

4 years ago today we lost the lovely Terry Wogan. I had the pleasure of meeting Terry at a book signing in Windsor, such a kind and funny man and I miss his dulcet tones on Radio 2 every morning.
Have you memories of our Terry?

Easy ways to live well.
At first I thought not one of these boring remedy programs again but it was very interesting.

Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall is increasingly worried that he’s starting losing his mental sharpness and was advised to start--- knitting ---with improvement at the end of the trial.

Steph McGovern pregnant, apprehensive about exercising, so Dr Zoe Williams recommends that she try belly dancing – an exercise known by the Bedouin Arabs to ease labour and strengthen pelvic floor muscles.

Pain killers: A group is being prescribed 15 minutes of daily group singing, which has also been proven to reduce pain.
The amount of pain killers taken was drastically reduced.

Kids with fussy eating habits. Let them play with the food first making shapes and pictures.
This went too far with me. My kids ate what was given or went hungry.

Had a call this morning from a company doing yearly insurance on domestic appliances, they knew my name and address and even what appliances I have.
That said that last year I paid £118 but being a'loyal and valued customer' I get a reduction and this year would be only £98.
I have never taken out any of these sort of policies - do they think I wouldn't know ?

Sorry to steal your usual job Lonicera.....
"World Wetlands Day occurs annually on February 2, marking the date of the adoption of the Convention on Wetlands on February 2, 1971 when a small group of environmentalists signed an international agreement at the Ramsar Convention in Iran.[1]

Established to raise awareness about the value of wetlands for humanity and the planet, WWD was celebrated for the first time in 1997 and has grown since then. Each year, government agencies, non-governmental organizations, and groups of citizens at all levels of the community have taken advantage of the opportunity to undertake actions aimed at raising public awareness of wetland values and benefits such as conservation. Some of these benefits include: biologically diverse ecosystems that provide habitat for many species, serve as buffers on the coast against storms and flooding, and naturally filter water by breaking down or transforming harmful pollutants.[2]!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Wetlands_Day

Is there a noise that really upsets you?
What?
Why?
When?

If the USA want Prince Andrew, could we not have Anne Sacoolas who killed Harry Dunn.
What are your views?

See photo. We are trying to disconnect and drain our washing machine ready for move. We have turned the small blue lever off (we think). Having trouble detaching pipe but it doesn’t help that we don’t have a clue what we’re doing. We have unplugged. Do we only twist the grey bit or is it the blue and grey bit. It all seems a bit seized up. Assume complete stupidity on our part.

International Internet-Free Day Date in the current year: January 26, 2020

International Internet-Free Day It’s hard for a modern person to imagine their life without the Internet. We use it every day to find information, communicate and entertain ourselves. Without any doubt, the World Wide Web has made our lives so much easier, but have you ever thought that you rely on it too much and replace real-life communication with virtual one? To help you answer these questions, the creators of International Internet-Free Day suggest that you spend the last Sunday of January without using the Internet.

International Internet-Free Day was first celebrated on January 27, 2002. According to one version, it was initiated by the UK-based Institute for Social Inventions (now known as the Global Think Tank). Other sources claim that the observance was created by the non-commercial online project DoBe.org. Be that as it may, International Internet-Free Day was definitely conceived in the UK.

The main goal of its creators was to encourage people to turn off their computers for at least a day in order to break out of the social isolation caused by the prevalence of online communication. Instead of messaging your friends and relatives, isn’t it better to meet them in person? Instead of spending the day binge-watching another meaningless TV show, isn’t it better to go to a concert, visit a museum or just take a walk in the fresh air?

Of course, back in 2002, when International Internet-Free Day was invented, much fewer people had access to the Internet, and it was much easier to do without the World Wide Web for a day or two because it wasn’t so all-pervading as it is today. These days, when a lot of people have smartphones with mobile Internet access, they use Internet literally for everything, from communicating with other people (using a messenger is so much cheaper than texting when you don’t have an unlimited texting plan) and shopping to checking the weather forecast and public transport schedules. Naturally, going without the Internet even for several hours, let alone the
whole day, is much more difficult. But also much more useful!

Maybe you will find it hard not to use the Internet at all on International Internet-Free Day because of your job demands or for other objective reasons, but you can at least try to use it as little as possible. Skip the ritual of checking all the social media updates first thing in the morning, go to the movies instead of watching a film online, call your friend instead of messaging, leave your phone at home when you go for a walk and enjoy the scenery instead of catching Pokémon...

Absolutely any technology can do both good and harm. While acknowledging all the benefits of the Internet, it is important to keep in mind that an overabundance of information and tendency to escape into the virtual world from real problems won’t do you any good. That is why it is highly recommended that you give yourself a kind of “digital detox” at least once a year in order to take a break from the Internet and figure out whether you need it as much as you think.

In addition to International Internet-Free Day, there’s also World Day Without Wi-Fi designed to raise public awareness about the possible health risks of the wireless connection.

Saw a post about this on Next Door...the guy's looking for business. Says he's only been in business for a week and can't find anyone who needs help.

https://www.firstcall4care.com/

Elgetec Professional Salon Style Hairdryer 2200W

For full details, including affected model numbers and manufacturer’s advice, click here.

Reason for recall:

The live pins of the mains supply plug are too close to the outer edge. As the hairdryer does not have an earth wire, a consumer may receive an electric shock when (un)plugging the hair dryer. The product does not comply with the requirements of the Low Voltage Directive.
What should you do next?

Electrical Safety First recommends that anyone who discovers they have an electrical item that has been recalled should stop using it immediately
Check the product recall notification for details of what to do next
If no details are shown, you should contact either the seller or Citizens Advice on 03444 111 444 or visit them at www.citizensadvice.org.uk
More information on returning recalled products can be found here.

Checking your other electrical products

Our product checker contains the details of electrical products that have been recalled since 2007. If you have searched for a product that you own and it is not listed, this means that it has not been recalled and should be safe to use. However, if you do have concerns about its safety, contact the retailer or manufacturer to alert them to a potential problem.

This email was sent by Electrical Safety First

Disorder In The Court
These are supposed to be true exchanges that have occured in various United States' Courts of Law. But who cares if they're true, as long as they're funny...
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.

Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks

Q: This myasthenia gravis - does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give an example of something that you've forgotten?

Q: How old is your son - the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five - I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years

Q: What was the first thing that your husband said to you when he woke that morning?
A: He said "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.

Q: And where was the location of the accident?
A: Approximately milepost 499.
Q: And where is milepost 499?
A: Probably between milepost 498 and 500.

Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.

Q: Did you blow your horn or anything?
A: After the accident?
Q: Before the accident.
A: Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it.

Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in the voodoo or occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.

Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
A: Yes.
Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
A: Yes sir.
Q: What did she say?
A: What disco am I at?

Q: So the date of the conception of the baby was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?

Q: You say the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?

Q: Mr. Slattery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn't you?
A: I went to Europe, sir.
Q: And you took your new wife?

Q: How was the first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?

Q: Is your appearance here this morning persuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8.30pm.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.

Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?

Q: You were shot in the fracas?
A: No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, it was possible that the patient was still alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
A: It is possible that he could have been alive and practising law somewhere.

... And I've just had a bee checking out the daffodils in my garden!!!

... Please add yours.








LIFE




Summary of Life

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats..
2) When your Mum is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair..
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap..

[]

GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree....
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground...
5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.



GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD

1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional..
2) Forget the health food I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.


THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.


SUCCESS:

At age 4 success is . . . . not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . having friends.
At age 17 success is . . having a driver's license.
At age 35 success is . .. .having money.
At age 50 success is . .. . having money.
At age 70 success is . ... . having a drivers license.
At age 75 success is . . . having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . not piddling in your pants..

Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way;
BUT NEVER forget the blessings that come each day.

Have a wonderful day with many *smiles*

Take the time to live!!!
Life is too short.
Dance naked. woo-hoo

Can anyone advise on best bird boxes please, for suburban garden?

Regular visitors here are blue tits, great tits, long-tailed tits, goldfinches, wrens, and others.
Which box works best?

Recommended suppliers?

Placement?

All other comments gratefully received!

Should he be considered for a peerage?

Transportation Changes and Threat Levels
These are strange times with weird things occurring in the air travel and the international transportation industries. Most nations are making restrictive changes. Here is a summary:

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists themselves have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued "A Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the Great Fire of 1666.

The Scots raised their threat level from "Nicked Off" to "Get the Bastards." They don't have any other levels. For this reason they have been used on the front lines of the British army for the last 300 years.

The first four Canadian threat levels are still “Contented,” “Awake,” “Alert” and “Worried.” Alone among western nations, they remain at “Contented.” They say it’s because the recent episode missed them so they don’t want to offend anyone by increasing Canadian security alertness. Their highest level, by the way, is “Time to visit the aunt in Fargo, North Dakota again. Eh?”

The French government announced yesterday it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate." The increase was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability. It's not only the commonwealth and the French who are on a heightened level of security awareness, though.

Italy has increased its alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Strike Elaborate Military Poses." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans also increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Proudly Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all away on their usual holidays, and the only threat they are worried about is of NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are excited to see their new class of submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed futuristic subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Americans, meanwhile, besides asking for underwear checks on all inbound flight passengers, are scheduling pre-emptive full-blown Air Force One presidential visits to all their allies, mostly just to keep everybody else busy and pre-occupied.

New Zealand has raised its security levels from "baaa" to "BAAAA!" Due to continuing defence cutbacks (their Air Force being a lot of spotty teenagers flying paper airplanes and the Navy some lads with toy boats in the Prime Minister's bath), the Kiwis only have one more level of escalation, which is "Australia Will Probably Come and Rescue Us Again."

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No Worries" to "She'll Be Right, Mate." Three more escalation levels remain: "Crikey", "I Think We'll Need to Cancel the Barbie This Weekend" and "The Barbie is Cancelled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of "The Barbie is Cancelled."

HOW MEN AMUSE THEMSELVES IN TESCO

Proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or boyfriend along shopping

This letter was actually sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in Oxford :


Dear Mrs. Murray,

Whilst we would like to thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you and your family from shopping with us, unless your
Husband stops his antics.

Below is a list of his actions over the past few months all verified by our surveillance cameras:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's trolleys when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine products aisle.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares..... And watched what happened.

5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calorgas stove.

7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he began to cry and asked, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

8.. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.

9. October 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants were.

10. November 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the Mission Impossible' theme.

11.November 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the 'Madonna look' using different size funnels.

12. November 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled' PICK ME!' 'PICK ME!'

13. November 21: When an announcement came over the loudspeaker, assumed the foetal position and screamed 'NO! NO! It's those voices again.'

And; last, but not least:

14. November 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while; then yelled, very loudly, 'There is no toilet paper in here.'

These were (ALLEGEDLY) posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a great sense of humour (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for cretins!)

__________________________________________________
Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK ).

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
__________________________________________________
Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA )
A:Depends how much you've been drinking.
__________________________________________________
Q:I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden)

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
__________________________________________________
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia ? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane , Cairns , Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?
__________________________________________________
Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? ( USA )

A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe ...
Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not
... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.
__________________________________________________
Q:Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA )
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
_________________________________________________
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK )


A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do...
__________________________________________________
Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA )

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is
Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
__________________________________________________

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK )


A: You are a British politician, right?
__________________________________________________

Q:Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? ( Germany )
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers.
Milk is illegal.
__________________________________________________

Q:Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can Dispense rattlesnake serum. ( USA )

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from.
All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Australia , but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA )
A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them.
You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
__________________________________________________

Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? (USA)

A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
__________________________________________________

Q:Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France )

A: Only at Christmas.
__________________________________________________

Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA )
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first

Do you use it? Any good? ….and of course it's not free, we all pay for the library service, so is it worth it?

......I can feel the warmth of the Sun through the window.........but deffo a bit nippy outside !!!
when do you reckon the snow will arrive ?

Currently hibernating but had a nightmare about missing out on being "woke".
What is wokefulness?
Is ignorance bliss??

If you're fed up with your usual gym routine, have a look at this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAEBNEscL0c

Are we on strike??????

Spectacular

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NelX3Tp3ijg

Ice weddings.

Cheap and cheerful Christmas lights could start a fire in your home.

Almost 50% of Christmas lights we bought from third-party sellers through online marketplaces were unsafe. AliExpress, eBay and Wish each sold products that could electrocute you or cause a fire, the potentially devastating consequences of which are shown here.

After repeatedly finding serious safety concerns across a range of products we’ve tested, we’re calling for an urgent strengthening of consumer protections for online marketplaces.

Read more about our calls and check whether you’ve purchased these dangerous lights.
https://conversation.which.co.uk/money/online-marketplace-regulation/?utm_source=whichcouk&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=christmaslights161219

in the current year: January 17, 2020
Kid Inventors' Day Kid Inventors' Day is annually celebrated on January 17. The holiday honors all kids inventors around the world, who invented different things, that are common today.

Kid Inventors' Day is celebrated on the birthday of Benjamin Franklin, one of the most influential politician in the history of the USA. The history of the holiday dates back to 1718, when young Ben stood on the edge of water and wished (like all boys do) he could swim faster. Ben didn't forget his dream and invented the first pair of swimming flippers. Back then Ben was only 12 years old, but his invention is a gift for all scuba and snorkeling divers.

Braille system was also invented by a kid. The blind Louis Braille, 15, was frustrated with the “night system” of letters available to blind. He decided to improve the system and his new reading and writing system was named after him.

There are lots of inventions, that were made by kids. Encourage kids to solve problems of their environment by different inventions. This is the reason why Kid Inventors' Day exists.