https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/events060829/

Check this out and cheer up

Afghan Mum names baby after plane

https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/baby-named-reach-born-about-aircraft-of-same-name/

What an awful end to this poor man’s life

https://www.dailystar.co.uk/news/latest-news/diy-sos-star-died-brain-24842654?__twitter_impression=true

And some of the men that done it are already out of prison

Asner became a TV icon as the gruff Lou Grant

A moth goes into a podiatrist’s office, and the podiatrist’s officer says, “What seems to be the problem, moth?”

The moth says “What’s the problem? Where do I begin, man? I go to work for Gregory Illinivich, and all day long I work. Honestly doc, I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I don’t even know if Gregory Illinivich knows. He only knows that he has power over me, and that seems to bring him happiness. But I don’t know, I wake up in a malaise, and I walk here and there… at night I…I sometimes wake up and I turn to some old lady in my bed that’s on my arm. A lady that I once loved, doc. I don’t know where to turn to. My youngest, Alexendria, she fell in the…in the cold of last year. The cold took her down, as it did many of us. And my other boy, and this is the hardest pill to swallow, doc. My other boy, Gregarro Ivinalititavitch… I no longer love him. As much as it pains me to say, when I look in his eyes, all I see is the same cowardice that I… that I catch when I take a glimpse of my own face in the mirror. If only I wasn’t such a coward, then perhaps…perhaps I could bring myself to reach over to that cocked and loaded gun that lays on the bedside behind me and end this hellish facade once and for all…Doc, sometimes I feel like a spider, even though I’m a moth, just barely hanging on to my web with an everlasting fire underneath me. I’m not feeling good. And so the doctor says, “Moth, man, you’re troubled. But you should be seeing a psychiatrist. Why on earth did you come here?”

And the moth says, “‘Cause the light was on”. 😂


: Norm MacDonald.

Declan, Mick and Steve entered their local pub’s weekly raffle and to their surprise, they each won a prize:
Declan a bottle of whisky, Mick a large turkey and Steve a toilet brush.
The next week, they met again in the pub and talked about their prizes.
Declan extolled the pleasures of his smooth Scotch whisky, while Mick reported that the turkey was the most delicious he had ever tasted.
Steve looked rather glum and when asked about the toilet brush.
‘It wasn’t that great,’ he said. ‘I think I’ll go back to using paper.’

You have until 4pm to make your predictions for a 4.30pm kick-off.
At around that time I will publish the odds for each prediction. Odds convert to points if your prediction is right based on a virtual £1 bet.
The match chosen for prediction is always the later televised game to give more time to make a prediction.
I try to post as early as I can, always in the morning.
Good luck

Sid's wife,Mary, refusing to give in to the looks of growing old, goes out and buys a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger.
After a lengthy sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products, she asks him - "Darling, honestly, if you didn't know me, what age would you say I am?"
Looking over her carefully, Sid replied... "Judging from your skin, twenty; your hair, eighteen; and your figure, twenty five."
"Oh, you flatterer!" she gushed. Just as she was about to tell him his reward, he stops her by saying: "WHOA, hold on there sweetie... I haven't added them up yet!"
P.S - Please let us know if you've seen him, we're very worried.

Liverpool conference now to be a virtual conference after sexual harassment claims.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-58371251

due to a shortage of glass vials 😮

https://www.gifvi.com/gifs/gifvi-1629972580045.gif?fbclid=IwAR0KjC-PcqttmJ9x-ohkSoN3xziRE0-rt-Ci_59HkktwQd4JQNMchtxN5CI

Pat staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy.   He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Kathleen.

He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step.   As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump.   A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful.

Managing not to yell, Pat sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding.   He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood.

He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed.

In the morning, Pat woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Kathleen staring at him from across the room.

She said, 'You were drunk again last night weren't you?'

Pat said, 'Why you say such a mean thing?'

'Well,' Kathleen said, 'it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly ....... it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror.

Pat and Mike were walking along a street in London. Pat looked in one of the shop windows and saw a sign that caught his eye.
The sign read: "Suits £5.00 each, Shirts £3.00 each, Trousers £4.50 per pair".
Pat said to his pal, "Mike look at these prices! We could buy a whole lot of those and when we get back home we could make a fortune.
Now when we go in you stay quiet, okay? Let me do all the talking 'cause if they hear our accents, they might think we're thicko's from the country and try to screw us. I'll put on me best English accent."
"Right you are Pat, I'll keep me mouth shut, so you do all the business" said Mike.
They go in and Pat said in a posh voice "Hello my good man. I'll take 50 suits at £5.00 each, 100 shirts at £3.00 each and 50 pairs of trousers at £4.50 each. And I’ll back up the truck ready to load them on."
The owner of the shop said quietly "You're from the country aren't you?"
"Well yes," said a surprised Pat. "What gave it away?"
The owner replied, "This is a dry-cleaners."

Australia's biggest export is boomerangs. It's also their biggest import.

🪃

🤣

Get your predictions in by 5pm, when I will be giving the odds.
Good luck

Bring out your dead children and bury them deep,

Give vent to your sorrow cry loudly and weep,

Let blood soak the ground from the grave to the shore,

Then let man worship long, - at the altar of war.

Stain deeply the lands with the souls of the slain,

Ingrained on your hands and ingrained in your brain,

A mad repetition that was practised before,

As man worships long, - at the altar of war.

No end to your madness no end to your greed,

Is it all domination that you crave to succeed,

As poisoned your mind is, as red is your hand,

We are weary of this, - can you not understand.

This World, this great Planet, and the child of your seed,

Is sickened and sad by your slaughtering deed,

And asks that you change and a peace do restore,

So that we and our World, can eradicate war.

No more should the rivers run red with our blood,

No more should these lands be of rubble and mud,

No more should a poison rise up in the sky,

No more!, - should this Planet!, ask itself!. - WHY?.

Mick Westwood

Artist - Léa Roche Spanish Painter.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-58354855 Is anyone else annoyed by this? It's just asking for more bag-snatching etc.

Andrew Michael, who appeared alongside his wife, daughter and son has died aged 61 after a short illness.

https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment-arts-58356211.amp

... Unfortunately I had to empty my car's boot before I could fill it with garden waste and an old metal ironing board,
On arrival home, I then had to re-fill my boot with what I'd taken out.

Don't ask me what is in there, I haven't a clue but it's back where it was, well maybe not exactly where it was because I don't know what was where! I do know it's all in the boot.

But I can't be the only one - can I?

What have you got in your boot?
Do you know what you've got in your boot?
Should it really be in your boot?

https://www.motorcycle.com/manufacturer/ural-manufacturer/sidecar-boat.html

The Canterbury Belle

Masks are said not to protect us but to stop us spreading Covid to others, of 6 people in my local Co-op I was the only one wearing a mask so what is protecting me from the no maskers ?

😂😳😂

McDonalds runs out of milkshakes amid disruption to supply chain.

When the milk, tea or spuds run out is time to worry?
What would you miss most from your shopping list?

Well, it's happened! The threatened security breach has taken place, although this is probably the first of many and is unserstood to have been caused by Islamic State (IS) .

At the moment (15:18) it's unclear what the casualty figures are, but there will be people who, if they have survived (and continue to survive), will have life changing injuries.

What a world we live in!

There are many people in Afghanistan who have fought for and worked on behalf of our armed forces, people who if they do not get a flight out of that country face death within the next week or so.

It must be so cheering for them to hear that there are people in this country (and some on this forum) who are so concerned about "Johnny Foreigner" coming to this country and perhaps lowering their standard of living and complaining about what they will lose in their life, without even caring that if those people cannot come here they may no longer have a life to live - of any standard.

I find it disgusting that anybody should deprive those on the death list entry to this country with the safety it affords!

click on

I think it’s encouraging news to see vaccinations offered at these large events .

https://news.sky.com/story/covid-19-jabs-are-on-the-line-up-at-reading-and-leeds-music-festivals-12390763

Especially after the rise in cases after two recent events.

The male African Jacana is the primary caretaker, carrying his baby chicks under his wings to keep them warm and safe.

A great invention from an Essex lad

https://www.itv.com/news/anglia/2021-08-25/device-which-stops-blood-in-stabbing-victims-wins-james-dyson-design-award

This is in the national news

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-essex-58322653

At the correct angle and in the correct light, their long wing and tail feathers reveal a prism of rainbow colours.

* Photo by Christian Spencer.

5 weeks ago I booked for a grass cutting, due to come last week but didn't, they rebooked for today - didn't turn up and when I phoned was told he has gone on holiday and is all booked up for next week.
They said they will phone next week if he can squeeze me in, the grass is very long and I am not a happy bunny today.

... Or should that be bear it?

Debate on FB about saying things the other [wrong ?] way round ..... apparently Mary Berry annoys people by always saying pepper and salt, not salt and pepper.
There have been moans about saying bacon & eggs instead of eggs & bacon.
How do you pair things ?

Another Carabao Cup match tonight between West Brom of the Championship against Arsenal.
Get your predictions in by 7.30pm.Good luck

RIP Charlie Watts

I've never thought of myself as a racist but the last week has got ridiculous.
The UK government has paid £114 million to the French government in order to stop illegal immigration since 2015 to June 2020 and in Jul 2021 the UK taxpayer handed over a further £55m to France. Yet more than 800 people were intercepted crossing English Channel yesterday. Channel migrants will keep coming, a French police chief warned on Thursday, as numbers for the year surged past 10,000.
Has the time come to immediately put them on a plane back to France? The french have our money and therefore need to sort this problem.

He talks a lot of sense

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRj9shk1/

Click on

This is our first League Cup match to predict. I think it's still called Carabao Cup.
Barrow are from League Two (old 4th division) versus Aston Villa of the Premier league. Aston Villa will probably use their reserve team and youth players.
Get you predictions in by 7.30pm for the 8pm kick off.
Good luck

I would like to recommend the new medical news feed Derek has sourced for the loop "Public Notices".

A GP in Burnham, Bucks, collates a weekly email for his patients covering the major medical news stories from the past week. Derek receives a copy and is now posting it, for the wider community, in Public Notices.

I think it's a useful read, and among other things, provides a helpful overview of the continually changing topics of Covid-19 and vaccination.

https://www.scooploop.com/thread/this-weeks-message-from-the-doctor

Are we ready?

Will members watch?

Still in Tokyo with an eight hour time difference .

It won’t take over the tv this time.

Crime in multi-storey car parks.

That is wrong on so many different levels. 😂

You have up to 7pm to get your predictions in. Kick-off 7.45.
That matches being chosen are the later or evening matches televised by Sky or BT featuring Premier League teams.
Good luck